Can't Do Without

I've found that there are some things in life that I just can't do without:

1. At least 3 tubes of lipstick in my purse at all times. People always ask me what shade of lipstick I'm wearing. I'm usually wearing at least 2 shades. I haven't found any 1 shade that I like yet.

2. Sleeping with the lamp on. If my nightstand lamp is not turned on, I won't hear my alarm clock in the mornings because my body thinks it's still nighttime. My bedroom window faces west, so I don't get direct sunlight in the mornings.

3. The Whole Foods Market. Literally changed my life. Earlier this year, I got an unfavorable report from the doctor (no, I'm not dying and don't have any diseases!). Instead of taking the lifelong regimine of pills that he prescribed (which in the long term would have done more damage than good), I did some research and immediately stopped eating fast food and processed grocery store foods, and drinking caffeinated, carbonated drinks and went organic all the way. I see results already. I can't wait for my check up next year!

4. A calculator. I have a sad confession. I have a Bachelor of Science degree in Electrical Engineering. I graduated at the top of my class. I tutor in Algebra, Geometry, and Calculus. I was 6 hrs away from a minor in Mathematics...but I CAN'T BALANCE MY CHECKBOOK WITHOUT A CALCULATOR! It's sad but it's true. I can tell you of at least 2 occasions where I attempted to balance it by hand, and ended up making errors to the tune of over $1000 total. Let me tell you, it's not cute to be looking cute standing in line at the bank and be told, "uh Ma'am, you have to have this amount in your account in order to get a certified check." HUH? WHAT DO YOU MEAN?! I KNOOOWWWW THAT MONEY IS IN THERE! "Ma'am, I'm sorry, here's a printout." I went home, got my CALCULATOR and discovered on that occasion that I had mis-balanced my account by about $500...ouch.

5. A vehicle with leather seats and a sunroof. Now don't get me wrong, I don't mind riding on cloth interior in someone else's car, I just don't care for it in mine (no, I'm not bourgeois...refer to the post "What You Probably Didn't Know"). Gotta have the sunroof. Somehow riding with the roof open makes me feel that much closer to God.

6. Football in the fall. Growing up, Friday night (or Saturday morning) football was just a way of life. Every boy in my family played football. My sister and I were cheerleaders. I played flag football in college and for Team USA until a few years ago. It's just a part of who I am.

7. Going on vacations with my family. Sounds boring? Then you don't know my family. Just to give you a taste of one of our last trips, picture this. I'm laying in the bed in the hotel room and there's a knock at the door. My mother opened it and it's my grandmother. At 71, she's one of the foxiest grandmothers you'll ever meet. So I hear her ask my mother how she looked. Then she sashayed over to ask my opinion of her outfit. Honestly she looked okay from the head to the knees. Then the problems started. I couldn't believe that my gradmother is standing there at 9 in the morning with a shirt, shorts, sandals and fishnet pantyhose on. Yes, I said FISHNET pantyhose.

Me: "Momee, where are you going with that on?!"
Momee: "Oh, what you talkin' about? I'm not in style?"
Me: "No Ma'am. Why are you wearing fishnets?"
Momee: "Well, I have these scars on my knees and they just look so bad. I was trying to cover them up. I thought it was in fashion to wear fishnets. I'm glad you told me 'cause I bought them in a few more colors."
Me: "Fishnets are in, but not like that. Your knees look fine without them."

That vacation was over a year ago. Lately, the last 2 times I've seen her, she had the fishnets on. (Most recently was last week) But, she's still the hottest grandma on the block!

You can't imagine the stories I can tell from going on vacations with these people. Like the time I caught my mother in the hotel mirror doing the Beyonce booty shaking dance. Then, she had the nerve to challenge me! She wanted to have a dance-off with me! Has the whole world gone mad?!

8. Music. I go to bed and wake up with a song in my head. Music is just a part of who I am. I'm sure it started before I was born (thanks Daddy!). I have a library of music in my head that is mind boggling. Music energizes me. Music soothes me. Music encourages me. Music comforts me. If it were up to me, every era of my life would have a soundtrack. Right now my life could be summed up in the immortal words of Chaka Khan "I'm Every Woman" or Karyn White "I'm Not Your Superwoman". Lately I feel like I've been doing the work of 20 women. I'm doin' TOO MUCH. I need to get away. It must be time for another family vacation.

Feel free to comment and tell me what you can't do without!

Who is Mr. Eddie?

Recently, everyone has been reflecting on the tragedy of last year's hurricane. I was reading my good friend Chanel's blog http://hipcandy.blogspot.com/2006/08/1-year-anniversary-of-hurricane.html, and it brought back such a flood of memories. One very special memory for me is of Mr. Eddie.

I met Mr. Eddie at the shelter that was here Baton Rouge at the River Center. I think he may have been one of the first people that we met that day. He was very approachable and very content. I don't say that lightly, considering that he was 80 years old, there all by himself and sleeping on a cot in a room filled with hundreds of other people. Mr. Eddie had a toothless smile that was so peaceful in the midst of so much sadness.

Over the next several weeks, I visited with Mr. Eddie often. I even offered to bring him home with me, but he refused. He wanted to stay at the shelter to wait for his money! I think he was just so happy to be alive that it didn't matter where he spent his nights.

Over the course of our encounters, Mr. Eddie told me about his family in Florida and the "friend" in New Orleans who was probably looking for him. We tried calling her number, but of course there was no phone service in New Orleans at that time. I still have Sally's number programmed in my phone. We talked about cooking and church. He told me that he was always the cook of the house, but he doesn't cook much anymore.

Mr. Eddie told me that he was being stubborn and didn't want to leave his house. One of his neighbors came by and forced him to leave. They got out just in time. He was so thankful that she did that. Unfortunately, he had to leave his house so fast that he left his teeth in the cup downstairs. He also left his glasses in the house. He knew that it wouldn't smell too good when he got back because he had a lot of meat in the freezer, particularily a very large turkey. I knew that he had family in Florida and wondered when they would come and get him, but he was in no hurry to leave until all of his checks had been delivered to Baton Rouge.

One day he called me and said that he needed to run some errands, so I went and picked him up. I wanted him to have the royal treatment, so I got permission from the city police who were guarding the shelter, to go through the baracade and pull my car right up to the front door. We went to the bank (yeah, his money was coming in!). We went to Walgreens and Wal-Mart, where he bought socks, sweatshirts, and magic shave. He wanted to buy me something, but I couldn't imagine him spending his money on me. He told me about his wife who had passed away and about his time as a longshoreman. He bragged about being married to the same woman for over 40 years (actually, I think it was 50 or 60 years but, I don't remember exactly). He described himself as a "rascal" in his day, but all I could see was a gentleman through that toothless smile.

The grand finale of the day was going to Popeyes. He had told me once before that he was craving some Popeyes chicken, but that he wasn't supposed to eat it (Dr.'s orders). On this day, his request was for me to take him to Popeyes, so that he could get some chicken and a "cold-drink". I was more than happy to oblige. He got chicken for himself and another guy who had befriended him at the shelter. He made me take $20 for gas. I tried to refuse, but he gave me a stern warning that I had better let him do what he wanted to do.

I didn't know that this would be the last time that I saw Mr. Eddie. I was supposed to go back and pick him up to go and do laundry. I tried twice, but we missed each other the first time. He had taken the bus to the bank that day. The next time I went to the shelter, he was gone. I looked all over for him. I asked the volunteers about him, described him to other evacuees, had him paged over the intercom system, checked the roster of shelter residents, had someone check the restrooms, checked with the medical staff...nothing. They had no record of him checking out, but obviously he was gone.

In reflection, it's amazing to me how much of an impact a person can have on you, when you're the one who is supposed to be impacting them. The Bible says to be careful how you entertain strangers, because you may be entertaining an angel without knowing it. Who is Mr. Eddie? Only God knows. Do I miss him? Of course. Will I ever see him again? I don't know, but I do know that he showed me what it meant to smile in the face of adversity. Because of Mr. Eddie, I know that I should always take time to love someone I don't know, help someone who can't help themselves, and make everyone feel special, no matter what their situation.

Katrina poured out its worst on us, but in a lot of ways, it brought out the best in us.

Thank you Mr. Eddie. Until we meet again...